In Pursuit of Sexual Wholeness: Discussion for Week 3

Opening Prayer

Welcome to the discussion for the third week of our discipleship series “In Pursuit of Sexual Wholeness”. Begin by praying in the following way:

1. Ask everyone to close their eyes and sit comfortably in a moment of silence.
2. After a few seconds encourage everyone to simply become aware of their breathing and to relax.
3. After a few more seconds ask everyone to consider anything from the day or recent past that is making them anxious. Make a point of letting it go, since you cannot affect it right now, and silently ask Jesus to take it from you (1 minute)
4. Ask everyone to consider anything about tomorrow or the future that is making them anxious. Make a point of letting it go, since you cannot affect it right now, and silently ask Jesus to take it from you (1 minute)
5. Ask everyone to consider any anxieties they have about this discussion. Encourage everyone to breathe deeply. On the in breath, breathe in God’s love for us. On the out-breath let go of fear (1 minute)
6. Close by praying the following prayer:

Lord Jesus. Thank you for your great love for us. Thank you that you as a fellow human-being understand our complexities: all our fears, our hopes, our sadness, our joys and all aspects of our humanity. We open ourselves to you now, that you might lead us into wholeness. Amen.

Scripture Reading

Ask someone to read the following scripture or have several people read a portion each.

John 4:1-30; 39-42 (New International Version)

1The Pharisees heard that Jesus was gaining and baptizing more disciples than John, 2although in fact it was not Jesus who baptized, but his disciples. 3When the Lord learned of this, he left Judea and went back once more to Galilee. 4Now he had to go through Samaria. 5So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son Joseph. 6Jacob's well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about the sixth hour. 7When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, "Will you give me a drink?" 8(His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.) 9The Samaritan woman said to him, "You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?" (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.) 10Jesus answered her, "If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water." 11"Sir," the woman said, "you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? 12Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his flocks and herds?" 13Jesus answered, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." 15The woman said to him, "Sir, give me this water so that I won't get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water." 16He told her, "Go, call your husband and come back."

 17"I have no husband," she replied. Jesus said to her, "You are right when you say you have no husband. 18The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true." 19"Sir," the woman said, "I can see that you are a prophet. 20Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem." 21Jesus declared, "Believe me, woman, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. 22You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth." 25The woman said, "I know that Messiah" (called Christ) "is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us." 26Then Jesus declared, "I who speak to you am he."

27Just then his disciples returned and were surprised to find him talking with a woman. But no one asked, "What do you want?" or "Why are you talking with her?"

 28Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, 29"Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ[b]?" 30They came out of the town and made their way toward him.

39Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman's testimony, "He told me everything I ever did." 40So when the Samaritans came to him, they urged him to stay with them, and he stayed two days. 41And because of his words many more became believers.

 42They said to the woman, "We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world."

Discussion

The following questions would be suitable to discuss with the whole group

1. In what ways do you identify with the woman in this story?
2. What does “a spring of living water” (v14) mean to you and how does that apply to your life?

The following questions might be more suitable for discussion in a smaller setting. Feel free to allow the group to break off into smaller discussions or save these questions for discussion with a close friend.

1. How helpful are you finding this series? In what way has it been relevant to you?
2. Describe or think about a time when you “acted out” sexually in a way that you regret in some way.

1.  
   1. What were the circumstances of this situation?
   2. Were you aware at the time that you might regret your action?
   3. Can you identify any “external pressures” causing your action?
   4. Can you identify any “internal pressures”?
   5. How would you describe these internal pressures?
   6. How do those internal pressures affect you now?

1. When you think about your own personal life from a sexual point of view, how “healthy” and “whole” do you feel?

1. Do you feel at peace?
2. Do you have any fear or anxiety?
3. Do you experience any shame about anything (form the past or currently)
4. Are there any areas of your sexual life that feel out of control or that even control you?

1. When you think about aspects of your sexual life from the question above: what do you think lies below or behind those issues? What do you sense is causing you to behave that way?
2. What are some steps you could take to address these “inner” issues? What help do you need to take those steps?

Reflection

Sit comfortably in silence as a group with eyes closed. Leader leads the group in the following way:

1. Invite everyone to reflect on the discussion and allow any issues or challenges to surface within. What has been most stirred up in you? (1 minute)
2. After a few moments ask everyone to pick one of these issues and silently reflect more deeply. What is really going on? What is at the root of this issue? (1 minute)
3. Leader prays: “Come Holy Spirit; come and fill our hearts as we open our lives to you. Touch us and help us with our struggles and pains” and then invites everyone to silently open themselves to God in relation to the issues that have surfaced (2 minutes)
4. Encourage everyone to consider what is happening. How is the Holy Spirit working within you at this moment? What is God doing? (1 minute)
5. Spend more time in silence with each person inviting God to deepen the work of the Holy Spirit within them (2 minutes).
6. Leader closes this reflection time by praying: “Thank you Jesus for your presence with us. Make us whole, we pray. Amen”

Spend another couple of minutes for each person to consider what might be appropriate personal next steps. Do you need any kind of help? Do you need to talk more deeply with someone? Group leader can share the various resources available as part of this series and encourage everyone to take advantage of them.

Closing Prayer

Leader or someone else closes the discussion with a prayer